Tell your trainer to meet me outside. I want to fight…

Alright, not really.

But I DO want to have a thoughtful discussion about the horse industry’s obsession with immediately “getting back on.” and speak on how it is often literally making horse trauma more severe. 

So let’s talk about it. Your nervous system loves two things: Predictability and a sense of control. Which means that it wants to be able to anticipate what’s coming and know that you have choices about what happens to you. In other words, it wants agency. 

Now imagine you’re unexpectedly bucked off. Maybe you’re injured. Maybe you’re not. Either way, something just happened that you didn’t predict and couldn’t control. Your nervous system just took two pretty big hits: “I didn’t know that was going to happen.” AND “I couldn’t stop it from happening.” I like to think of this as a compound fracture to the nervous system. There are two levels of damage happening.

And then imagine, while you’re still shaken up, someone tells you: “Get back on.” I understand the thinking behind this. (Lifetime of being a horsetrainers daughter, here. 🙋🏼‍♀️) And we certainly don’t want the horse learning that certain bad behaviour ends the ride. But I think we need to consider the nervous system of the RIDER too, and not only what the horse learns from this experience, but what the rider subconsciously learns from this experience.

Because if you’re terrified, shaking, crying, dissociating, panicking, ,completely overwhelmed or just shocked, and you feel like you have NO CHOICE but to get back on… what might your nervous system learn from that experience?

It registers not being able to end the bad experience on your own terms as “There’s a threat, and I can’t get away from it.” Basically your telling your nervous system, “Yes, I understand that Rocky just beat your @$$, now get back in the ring.”

That loss of agency matters. There is a big difference between: “I’m shaken up. Give me a minute. I’m going to regulate myself and then decide whether I want to get back on.” and “I’m terrified, but I’m not allowed to say no. I have to cowgirl up.”

Sometimes, if it’s safe and appropriate, someone else can get on and work with the horse. Meanwhile, YOU can breathe. You can take some time to ground yourself. Maybe that looks like EFT tapping, walking, or shaking it out. Let the adrenaline settle. Remind your body that you have choices. And only THEN decide what feels right for you.

I’m not anti “get back on.” I’m anti treating “get back on” as a universal rule regardless of the state of the rider. Because good horsemanship should never require us to completely disregard the nervous system of the human.

After a scary incident, sometimes one of the most healing things we can give our nervous system is agency:

“I have choices.”

“I can listen to my body.”

“I can decide what happens next.”

Inside The Herd of Two Guided Healing Community we're going to do just that... Restore the agency your nervous system is yearning for and heal from horse-related trauma. Your healing journey will be guided by me, and supported by others in the healing community.

Herd of Two is the first trauma-informed healing community of its kind created specifically for people who have experienced horse-related trauma. Drawing from my experience as a 200-hour YTT, co-founder of Cowboy Campus University, and a survivor of severe horse trauma, this guided healing community supports healing at the level of the nervous system and body. This is for those ready to feel safe in their bodies again, ride with confidence, and return to the saddle with calm, clarity, and self-trust. You can recliam your joy in the saddle. Join the waitlist to be the first to know when gates open!

— Shelby